slowly, spinning redemption.
Friday, August 03, 2007
who i've been hates who i am.
i've changed.
you know i never had a problem controlling my temper. people who know me can vouch - i rarely got mad. i could take a whole load of teasing, insulting, goading without snapping.
things aren't quite the same now. i blow up over trivial matters, have horrendous mood swings, and worst, i take out all my pent-up frustrations on the world around me.
and it's affecting me. i never wanted that to happen. everytime, i regret losing my cool, giving shit to lyn, even my closest friends. and it's such insignificant issues that prompt such a fiery reaction from me. i never had a problem with anger management, but clearly, things don't ever stay the same. do they?
you never used to be like that, you know?
you won't believe how much that hurt. i don't want this to jeopardize us. believe me, i'm trying. it isn't easy, fighting against myself. i never meant to make you this sad.
i'm trying. i pray that it'd be enough.
because you mean too much to me.
1:40 AM
